If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
if i remember New Year's Eve then there is something seriously wrong.
It's sad the highlight of the night was you didn't electrocute yourself again.
in a garage, wearing a toga, theyre debating the logistics of Coke Pong. If I don't make it out of here... it was me who stole your Barbie in the 4th grade- I've never forgiven myself.
I had to photo shop your nipple piercings. that was extremely awkward.
to instagram or to not instagram the picture i took of when i shit in the urinal
You chest bumped everyone we walked by on the way home... Even girls
Remember when we partied so hard that dude died and it cockblocked you hooking up with my sister?
I forgot that happened. That's the second dude that died on a vacation I've been on
I forgot to tell you. Your neighbor was walking his tiny dog and saw me crawl out of my jeep drunk vomiting and holding onto my bumper. He just said: morning! all friendly.
I don't care that you had sex on my bed. I care that you used my lollipop condom. I was saving that for a special occasion
It was a special occasion. Your best friend had crazy awesome sex on your bed. Thank you
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
is there a way to say "yea i broke my wrist cause i fell down some stairs while tripping my face off on acid" without actually saying it?
So the 25yr old smokeshow I fucked last night said "Prepare to be disappointed" as he put the condom on. I was. 40 is bullshit.
yeah, i thought because of the nature of his job he would have been better at it, but i guess there's a difference between a bagpipe and vagina
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