guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
He asked me to sit on his face, but i didnt, for 2 reasons, one, i had just pooped like 20 mins before sex, and two, this could be my future husband. so i skipped on sitting.
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
They're donating plasma together for extra money. Couple of the fucking century.
I understand Curling. That high.
Apparently I blacked out and pissed all over the sliding glass door from the inside, as everyone watched from the outside helplessly....
It felt like he was juggling my kidneys with the head of his penis... If you could even call it that, it was more like a lochness monster. Huge and mythical.
I never should have let my cousin and his pregnant girlfriend move in with me. I'm never having sex again. They scare off men more than 'my dream wedding' pin board.
I need to stop ravaging the freshman dorm like a virginity-snatching dragon.
It's been two days. I am still burping up jello. Everything tastes like jello. Everything smells like jello. I am DONE with jello shots.
The crooked penis I maybe could have looked past...but no foreplay? Deal breaker.
As long as he continues to be our subleaser and continues to fuck me, I think it's acceptable for me to steal a piece of bread here and there.
You know you hit Mardi Grad bottom when you come to in someone's kitchen on the floor and you are eating gumbo out of a Mixing bowl with a ladle......yeah rock fucking bottom
I woke up with her finger in my vag. Let's just say that I'm one horny inquisitive drunk.
I remember you banged her while I was dying on your couch, so good call
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