people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
Aunt Jean just announced that her pubic hair is getting thicker as her head hair gets thinner. As a family we are just not a people of mystery.
he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
The dean held back my hair as I was puking after graduation. That means so much more than a diploma and a handshake.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
Just remember that she is a giant dick-sucking forehead and you are better than that.
Today the house voted to defund Planned Parenthood but to continue funding NASCAR. I fucking hate everything.
We will have to go big on the 4th! Nothing says independence like the impending doom of an ankle monitor
He came into your room last night to tell me he was leaving, when I woke up this morning he was facedown in your hallway. He didn't make it very far.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He probably tastes like german chocolate and coffee beans
Seriously though, my ovaries are trying to crawl out of my body and into his pants.
You can't mix blow jobs, bacon, and Star Wars.
A) just did. And b-z) that sounds like a great Sunday morning.
Eating a grilled cheese at a strip club... good idea??
I've just never heard the term serendipitous used to describe having one's asshole licked.
So you just held his hand and he fucking came...?
We lost you in the bar so we waited outside for you...next thing you know you kick open the doors and yell "I'M ALIVE"
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