If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
Now all we have to do is pretend we haven't seen each other naked. Work tomorrow is going to be FUN.
The second I saw you stumbling down the stairs in a princess crown, I knew I had a friend for life.
Not only is it unacceptable to be bar hopping alone at 5 o'clock. It is definitely unacceptable to do so with a lobster
nah, they dropped the charges. apparently ripping his junk when he tried to hop the fence seemed like punishment enough...
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
Yeah. Let's save our goodbyes for when I'm obnoxiously and embarrassingly drunk and more than likely naked.
took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink
Made a holiday JibJab of all my fucks. How's your night?
There was confetti in my vomit this morning... Happy New Year!!
I'll be there in a few.
I'M COUNTING TO FEW.
So you're saying you don't want to be with her anymore because she likes sex to much and is just to hot?
Well when you say it that way it makes me sound like an idiot.
You are an idiot.
woke with Taco Bell next to me in bed and people's shoe sizes written on my arm.
Someone threw up pink in the shower, there's a golf cart tipped over on the lawn and Cousin Brian is missing. What could Friday night throw at us?
He ate me out in the passenger seat of his Range Rover in a Tim Hortons parking lot. I could hear “oh canada” on the radio from a nearby school as I came. Most patriotic orgasm ever!
Randomize
