im orety awesome arent i? relly i know i am
Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
Mario Lopez is the poor mans Ryan Seacrest
He had one of those small greek statue penises
I just realized that i have never seen about 30 percent of my friends sober before
Blew a line and having a jolly rancher... the day is looking up.
We're sitting in his room writing songs about America. There's a verse about a dead dog. There's tequila everywhere.
I want him to rummage through my vagina. with unwashed hands.
Fuck my life, there's a fry in my vagina.
I was talking about you wanting my dick, but that works too
i just want to be sober by dinner like is that too much to ask
No celebraish? But today's the day that Jesus, Bruce Springsteen, and a flock of bald eagles came down from the heavens in fighter jets with electric guitars and M-16s a blazon, saying "Hey America, fuck the Red Coats, it's time to party"
I never saw such an emotional argument over yellow vs. spicy mustard.
I'm just going to take the mature adult root and ignore him for a bit, and then pretend like I didn't see him jerking off.
I got titty fucked last night and you're breastfeeding your newborn. Clearly we have gone two totally different paths since 2011.
Randomize
