Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
my passenger side seat is covered in alcoholic jello with a nude mannequin in it
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
You were like pukeahontas last night, you tried to tell us you were okay, then you puked in the garden.
He just kept screaming "I have democratic immunity" as the cops dragged him into the car.
The cops are here to take me to jail, so I guess I have to go with them. If I'm not out by 6 p.m., there is some left-over lasagna in the fridge for you.
I'm sorry you couldn't sneak away today. You're the only guy I'm fucking that I can talk with about the other guys I'm fucking, and I need some advice
He came when he saw that my nipples were pieced
I'll pay you to write the paper but not for sex. You should only get paid for something you work hard at.
I WILL PAPERCUT YOUR URETHRA YOU DO NOT STEAL A MANS SECOND BIG MAC
He was jealous of me and threatened by me. I'm like, just cause I could fuck your girlfriend doesn't mean I'm going to
She's not even my type. She doesn't have a penis or a drug problem
...and that is the first time I've ever wished fewer naked women on someone I like.
Can you tell dad to stop liking and sharing porn on FB again?
i woke up to a text from someone I put in my phone last night as "Giant Penis"
what did G.P. say?
oddly enough it was a dick pic
When I came she triumphantly exclaimed, "MUAHAHA VICTORY IS MINE!"
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