Dude you just tried to have a one night stand with my ex girlfriend while we were trying to put you to bed upstairs.
but that still doesn't explain how i woke up on the couch down stairs.
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
Absence makes the cock grow harder.
Fuckbuddy couldn't meet, so she's trying to find a substitute to come fuck me. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
It looks like a tornado ripped through our living room and scattered clothes everywhere.
Count the bras. It was a category 3 whorenado ... I convinced the lesbians to come back to the apartment for a bottle of wine.
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
I saw a guy do a line this morning in line to start the 5k, happy thanksgiving!
I am not being the messenger for your booty call.
I spoon fed you cheerios when you were black out drunk. You owe me one.
For the sake of being nice I congratulated her and she replied with something along the lines of that I need to stay away from him and not touch him ever. I really wanted to be like "been there, done that" but my New Years resolution was to not start any cat fight over boys with small dicks before noon
I just Miyagied my roommate through her first set of tit pics. Her fuck buddy owes me.
I know but at least you've never been asked to have sex dressed up like Catwoman
The hotel had a helipad. Of course we had sex on it.
I woke up in an ill fitting childs tutu this morning and the shower curtain is knocked down. Wtf happened?
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
Didn't know my clit could produce that many orgasms in one night. Fuck my husband; think I might have to become a lesbian.
Randomize
