Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
WHY DOES GOD HATE MY DICK
so i'm just gonna leave my credit card in your mailbox so you can bail me outta jail.. deal?
Accidentally spilled a drink on her roommates skirt, offered to clean it, and got a blowjob out of the deal. Something went horribly right.
I feel like this is going to result in some sort of tearing in my vagina.
Thats a chance were just gonna have to take
she's unstoppable after she starts doing shots and yelling NANNER
Well just watched a guy puke in a trash can then proceed to pick pizza outta said trash can and eat it
No longer is one of my lifelong dreams to ride in a kangaroo pouch. You have eternally ruined that for me. Thank you.
I woke up with a bloody knee, 6 burn marks on my thigh and glitter nails If anyone asks I'm going to say You came into town
Oh okay well are you handling the "just sex part" like a professional hooker like I taught you?
I don't care what you say about him, his cock is the stuff dreams are made of.
Such a big mess for such a small penis
The bar brought brought it upon themselves, they played billy joels piano man before closing, it's not our fault the bar isn't a bar anymore, right?
I think/hope James is drunk. He's standing in the front lawn loudly declaring "I AM a popsicle!" Over and over....
At this point, I would not mind getting hit by a truck. It would mean I could get this over with quicker.
Randomize
