and now I know what throwing up pineapple chunks is like.
Yeah, we had those soaking in vodka for like 36 hours
outstanding.
Making pb&j crepes. Using corn tortillas. So high. I don't know if I'm offending French people or Mexican people more.
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
Everytime I know she spent a lot of time on her hair for one of our dates, I intentionally cum on the top of her head. That's how she knows I pay attention.
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
I bought 2 40s with winning lottery tickets and they paid me $.03. 'Merica
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
I'm going out with a guy whose nickname is Shark Week cause he'll eat anyone. I'm very excited.
A homeless guy wouldnt accept my granola bar because he didnt have any teeth. I think i win the prize for the ultimate rejection
he wouldnt let me in bed until i took off all the stickers i was covered in
Well, I dont really know how much penis you have at your disposal so I cant be sure
party devolved into two exes battling with Cal's tiki torches, and the lawn being set on fire kinda sorta and then we all hula'ed... hulaed?
how do i say "cradle the balls" in Italian
will you help me invent vagina-safe pop rocks?
Its nights like last night that make me want to high five my liver.
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