is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
What drug did you take that made the cabinets scream at you?
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
Eating doritas dunked in queso con salas. Salllas. Salska. Salsa. Got it. Shhiitt. Salsa con queso. That's better. I'm hot pink socks.
no dont talk to me..because of you my bar tab was more expensive than my hospital bill
Just headbutted a photographer. This convention just got really interesting.
What's the right thing to say when he sends me a picture of his penis ?
I just want my birth control to stop making me feel like I'm watching baby seals get clubbed to death any time anything even remotely unpleasant happens lol
Well she started to strip and when she slung her hair at me, she painted my face with sweat. A LOT OF SWEAT. It was a weird boner.
I'm sad that I feel like I need to temporarily change your name in my phone from Smashley until you have the baby and can be unsober with us again.
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
THIS IS THE 11TH FUCKING COFFEE TABLE THAT YOU AND RICHARD CRASHED THROUGH.
I'm surprised me and Richard survived 11 of your coffee tables.
YOU TWO ARE BUYING ME A NEW ONE I AM PISSED.
i feel as though me waking up and asking her if i went to the hospital was a sign that i was not okay
You might see me up a tree with a deranged look in my eye , just walk away at that point
Randomize
