Who is John, and why is his named carved into our toilet?
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
Were you really trying to feed me potato chips while I was sitting on the toilet?
She definitely pulled a diaper out of her purse and cleaned up the vodka with it, where do you meet these people?!
I'm sorry I ignored your high cries for help while you were grating cheese on my dog.
You said you didn't want to drink anymore so you started shooting vodka down the back of your throat using a syringe. Oh, and then you aimed it at my eye ball...vodka in the eye hurts btw.
She was eating leaves off of trees and saying it was salad, and even told a guy in passing that her favorite color was plaid.
You were too drunk yesterday to deal with me crying so I am too drunk to deal with logic.
Just at the gym drinking. We call it treadmillcolada
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
So "I hate myself Mondays" has extended to Tuesday this week. I just had peanut butter and a glass of wine for lunch.
I want to die, ON THAT, with that INSIDE ME. ironically, I sense that would be the only time I'd feel alive.
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
Randomize
