Bad news is im a slut again. Good news is its with people ive been a slut with before.
In my junk email folder, there are literally 67 messages from Alcoholics Anonymous. What..the fuck.
It got kind of awkward when her dad brought home a 20 something asian girl at 3am
gave you a haircut while you slept. Please don't kill me.
So I'm drinking wine and watching Thumbelina
I'm teaching my cat to play fetch
Yep, it's a friday
It sounds miserable..I have to wear a dress and it's a cash bar?
I'm making myself a nametag with my contact info and pinning it to myself like a kindergardenter in case I get lost when I black out on Sat.
Can we laminate it? Just to be safe.
Maybe it's just my body's way of telling me I don't need pinky toes. Like I'm the next evolutionary leap or something...
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
i think she just faxed a picture of her vag from the office copy machine... i mean what kind of sexting is that... wait is that even legal???
So we stayed at his mom's and all got drunk and he and I hooked up in his old bedroom. Then his drunk mom came in and tackled us when we were still naked. Why does this keep happening to me?
He's probably the biggest I've seen outside of the porn I vehemently deny watching and he asks if I think he's too small
I think everyone at the office can tell I'm dehydrated
you mean still drunk
I've heard it both ways
How do you explain to your mom that you let your friend stab you in the leg while drunk and high on coke?
Is talking to an iron man poster a good or bad indicator that you've been drinking too much?
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