She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
I woke up this morning to my phone notebook open and written was "reasons why I'm a whore in chronological order" then it listed everybody I've had sex with in the past five months.
Two portable blenders. We are going to be popular and dangerous.
who put toothpaste on EVERY doorknob in my house?!
Helped an old lady on crutches throw away her mcdonalds, carried her stuff to the car and helped her get in...most productive cinco de mayo hands down
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
So I peed on what I thought was a wall while in nashville come to find out while running from the cop it was just a dark tinted window and the while bar witnessed me peeing
In honor of the internet blackout, I think everyone needs to change their Facebook pictures to ones of them being blacked out.
Our room will be decorated with my urine.
Since the world is still here you can go ahead and disregard those pictures I sent
Dude are you wearing a trashbag right now?....
I seemed to have misplaced my pants...
You can't break up with me. I brought you to see Beyoncé.
Actually, I may scrap this entire plan. I just realized that I had sex with a guy with his own whiskey commercial.
Randomize
