im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me
He is such a slut. More and more my type.
I feel that the whole multiple orgasm thing is god's way of saying "sorry for the childbirth deal"
just got drunk at a party with Christmas themed solo cups.. holidays are officially here.
She had to put it in. I told her I was too drunk and didnt trust myself to not put it in her ass.
I just added 'steal mom's xanax' to my to do list for when I go home for Easter.
Tell me why I keep soberly hesitating to go pee in fear of breaking the seal. Thank you college.
Getting high magically turns headaches into rainbows.
I think my body is literally trying to get me to reproduce. "fuck someone! Anyone!" - my body
Somehow she talked me into getting my dick pierced, weird first date.
I was going to say that I wasn't sure how that happened... but then I remembered that I bonded with the Australians over vitamins and INXS and they bought me tequila.
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
Maybe if you would fuck your boss you would get string cheese too
can we not speak foreign languages when I'm on drugs
It's starting to get sad how I have this 'new beginning' feeling after every negative pregnancy test
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