Someone just uploaded pictures on facebook of you making out with random girls. I'm telling you because I'm assuming you don't remember anything, but the 236 pictures in the album should give you a good clue.
She started to rub her ass on my shoulder and i instantly thought "i am going to get E. Coli"
What is the appropriate way to inform him that I am TOTALLY down for break up sex?
i think dick pics are a sign of a sexual renaissance
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
should I tell them that both of them had sex with me last Saturday? it might be a relationship builder type of thing you know?
It's always awkward in the office the day after your boss sends you a dick pic.
I hope to God it's not the new neighbors having sex, because what I'm hearing sounds like a mildly defective vuvuzela or a cow giving birth.
It's like those toothpaste commercials where 4 out of 5 dentists would recommend your vagina
Dude, putting on underwear straight out of the dryer is the greatest thing ever. It feels like I wrapped my vagina in a warm blanket.
Are you aware that you called your mom to say hi before you dragged the random guy into bed last night?
If dispatch calls for us tell them I'm having a significant emotional event in the restroom
Like people our age are getting engaged, and I’m out here spooning with a giant unicorn I bought at Walmart on Black Friday.
TJ is going to paint me in a Patriots Jersey he can paint you in an eagle jersey. Did this last year and got so much dick.
DON NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES WATCH CLOWN PORN.
Randomize
