I dont abuse you, i just hit you while we have sex
My cock was attacked by outdoor plants
yeah my walk of shame consisted of driving on the wrong side of the road at 6am still drunk with cum drying in my hair and left eye.
I just told this girl who bought a pregnancy test "good luck"
I googled "I hate my uterus" just to make sure I wasn't the only one.
i love how cold weather makes identifying sluts easier. is it below freezing? is she wearing a tube top? she's easy.
are you sure you're not interested? he's the dunkin donuts employee of the month.
I think I should become a real estate agent in th friend zone I know the place so well
I'm playing a little game called "how many shots of jack can I take before I become a shit show tonight". All front row seats are sold out.
He was the one that got away. From my vagina.
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
I or someone else dumped a lot of glitter into my boobs last night.
Let's not forget that we had sex on the ground in public tonight.
He expects a blow job at the movies but won’t pay for popcorn? Does he know it’s not 2017 anymore
Randomize
