I have to look really hot tonight because my personality is going to suck.
Most awkward thing ever just happened. I was reaching in my purse to get something and a condom fell out into the woman's lap next to me. At least she knows I'm safe.
i found a dude playing guitar on the portapotty
At what point last night did I start ordering doubles?
Right after we had the just friends talk..
Just drive me around campus, I will be able to smell their innocence.
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
Just walk straight and zig zag through cars tell you get to the road. That's where I am. Perpendicular to the doors do not make any turns
What a dumb baby whore.
Oh, and also, a couple of straight girls showed up. But they ran away.
Well, no one has ever described you as a perfectly balanced individual
don't get you morals all over my torrid fantasties
Just heard him in the middle stall. Sounded like someone emptied a toolbox into the toilet.
My ex unfollowed me on SPOTIFY bruh. Freaking spotify. The butthurt is real
i just used your hair clip to unclog my bong. i miss you so much!
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
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