i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times
it was great that she threw up because that made me the only one trying to hook up with her
You just got cockblocked by Conan O'Brien.
You tried to pay the bartender in graduation checks, I think you'll be fine in the real world.
dont get mad but guess who just got banned for life from dodger stadium
apparently drunk me likes to play hide the puke.. was not a fun time washing all my legos.
She was really fucking loud. My neighbors definetly knew my name...
Look, as a friend I'm asking to see a picture of his tiny dick
We woke up in the room with a hamburger patty on the bed side table, one bun across the room, and the other bun under my pillow. Still don't know who ordered room service.
She is the epitome of a puke & rally. She picked a random hott guy at the bar & made him pinky promise not to leave while she took a power nap. She went & passed out in her friends car & apparently puked just outside the bar. She stumbled in & found the randome guy again & claimed she was golden. Made it to the after party & stayed up til 6 doing body shots off every girl she saw & hooked up with the random from the bar. I love her life
If this nail lady pinches my achilles one more time im kicking her directly in her bedazzled boobs
i'm sitting in bed scratching my boobs and wearing a sparkly fedora and have no one to blame but myself
Tell him to put up or shut up. Can't be dangling dick in front of ho's without delivering.
It's just disrespectful
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
Randomize