omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
You put a thong on my pumpkin didn't you.
you ran down to the water at 3am and rolled in the sand and ran around screaming that you were the corn dog monster.
the bottle said: caution extremely flammable. so that was my motivation.
Nyquil jello-shots aiding in health and happiness
It's not like I'm never gonna put out again. I'm a sure thing. I promise.
They want me to get them some X for there wedding present. I'm on the way to get it now
Seriously! We need to take her a thank you note or something. She puts up with the drugs and the extremely loud sex. She deserves a thank you card.
I mean, on what planet are nipples suppose to look like that?
Ehhh, contemplating pain killers and fruit snacks if that's any indication.
I saw him and didn't have sex with him. Responsibility five!
Bored of what? I stayed up all night researching sex toys because I'm excited to do things with you that I haven't done in 29 years of having a body.
I woke up naked and only wearing cowboy boots, wrapped in a curtain that was still attached to the pole
I had a dream I hooked up with Post Malone. I can still smell the dream
so i put my jacket on last night that you wore last weekend, and reach inside the pockets and find them full of goldfish...
the snack that smiles back:)
Randomize