My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
dude if Megan calls say you Sis was house sitting for me yesterday , she f'n found dana's panties
it was like weight watchers had a halloween party.
Just tried to tap morse code on the wall seperating our beds to tell you I was awake and ready to smoke
In order of importance: Where am I? Where's my car? Where are my clothes? Who is this chick in the room?
Anne's couch, the bar, your car, Anne.
Apparently she saw two women get in a slapping match over a comforter at target yesterday. She said it was awesome. Clearly I take after her.
2nd fun fact: he has a square tan line around his dick.
This guy just asked me to stab his arm with my keys to make sure he wasn't dying.
I would ask what did you do but I feel like who did you do is probably more appropriate
I almost just texted "I'm lonely" to my gynecologist.
idk i was trying to watch Fuller House and you got up out of a dead sleep, just in your boxers, said "no more Dave Coulier" and walked out to the living room and unplugged the router
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
"Fwd: Nice to meet you last night thanks for the tit flash" no recollec. i am officially banned from wearing tube tops to the bar.
They want a bedroom just for their cats. And you thought we were gay.
Randomize
