I just accidently tagged myself in the picture of the 16 year olds spreading their legs in bikinis. Failure.
She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
She's a squirter....that makes up for lots of other annoying things
The swelling on my elbow and tongue means I may have cockblocked myself.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We literaly had to peel your fingers off the jose cuervo bottle and lock it in someones room
That just sounds like a recipe for sex in my backyard. Yes.
I don't see what kind of idea someone could get from an envelope covered in jesus stickers and a note from a person and their dog. I'd say crazy person alert before flirting.
He told her hed rather go bobbing for apples in puke than have sex with her.
He was bigger soft than my ex was hard. A gold medal rebound.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
According to him, i kept saying "I'm belligerent as SHIT" and tried to run around the house in just my bra and underwear. Thats when they decided to carry me to the car and take me home.
It's like when your main girl and your side girl start having their period in the same week
You are the most depressed sports fan I know
He said he wanted to start giving out "sex souvenirs". I got a poster with a penguin on it.
I saw a spider on my bed and my first reaction was to throw my weed bag to safety
Dude why can't I remember anything after walking in from my first beer bong?
It was immediately followed by your second, third, fourth and fifth
I hate when I'm sexting and I make a typo.
You just killed the sext mood.
Randomize