eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
Today I ate a sandwich and half my molar fell off, feels like a semi sprayed into my jaw.
I wish i was spraying into your jaw.
Are you going to tell your therapist we boned?
to be honest..when i was little i used to think sharks can swim out of drains and eat people
This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
this just has baby written all over it
So I put about 15 worms in the cuervo bottle. I don't think that's how it works but I feel like hallucinating by 11am
All I had with a note saying that my shoes are in the ceiling and good luck.
I could end up kidnapped. Or worse, the night will be really awkward.
thanks for leaving the note with the doctor's recommendations for my lip, they are dissolvable stitches right?
Well it looked like you were having a fucking apiphany sitting at the toilet with a t shirt around your head
I think your dick broke my retainer, I normally wouldnt care but my orthodontist died and I don't want my first appt to be blow job broken retainer with a new ortho.
And i'll likely end up sleeping in a bush wrapped up in my poncho
I wish he’d realize all I want is dick. He’s my boytoy. He’s a stunt cock. \n\nCome over, fuck me silly, eat some leftovers, fuck me again, then go back to the frat house
We got high, had sex, and watched retro scooby doo shows. Best friends with benefits yet.
Randomize
