writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
just crush a couple of percocets into it. tell him sam adams came out with a new beer. flavored with sleep.
When I try to close my eyes ibwant to puke. Going to the basement to watch pocohantas. That'll keep myeyes open. And puke free.
Dear room mates I tried to shotgun pam in the kitchen. It is slippery. Please be careful. That is all. Love you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake
I lost my keys but found four buffalo wings in my pockets
I dont think I should be allowed to pick my own boyfriends anymore
Do you participate in Sunday morning booty calls?
Dammit! I didn't see this message, of course I do.
Oh, also as a concerning side note, my bra had drops of blood on it. So I don't know what the deal was, but someone I was around was definitely bleeding a decent amount.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's getting Easter eggs filled with weed or Jell-O shots for his birthday
He found his first fuckbuddy I'm so proud I feel like making him a card or something
How the hell does my fucking boss know about the goddamned magician I fucked?!?
I wish drunk me came with subtitles
please don't forget about the bread in the toilet i am absolutely not dealing with that
He ate me out in a limo while we were driving home. I love bars being open again!
Randomize