i dont know what it was but it was definately NOT a vagina
He walked into the party with a case on one shoulder and a boom box on the other of course I fucked him
I wish I could go back in time 3 years and tell my freshman self how easy it is to hook up with freshmen
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I elbow dropped a bag of ice to break it so we could make margaritas. I bled everywhere. Be proud.
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
Sorry we're taking so long, this weed cake tastes amazing with Tabasco sauce on it.
When I left you, you were walking into a room with a half naked girl. When I returned 2 minutes later, you were locked out of the room naked and she was screaming obscenities from inside. How do you manage to make every girl hat you?
At one point I was convinced he was a snake and was going to eat me And I just accepted it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yes. Life would be much easier if we had penises & could do whatever the fuck we want.
It's not my fault you decided to fall in love with a Frodo Baggins lookalike
VASECTOMY FOR THE WIN
I just got CPR certified, don't make me need these skills so soon
Instead of going to my moms birthday party I went over and gave him head. I should win non girlfriend of the year award
it's my fake id's birthday. i'm wearing a hat, and i have a beard. i'm untouchable. TO THE BARS!
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