So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
alcohol turns me into mario batali of easy mac
she gave him a mild concussion from throwing him against the wall in an attempt to dance with him. gotta love monday nights at the sandbar.
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
Who's nuvaring is under my pillow?
Regardless of age or alcohol consumption, the knowledge that my dad spanks my mom sexually has the very real potential to fuck my shit up.
Why did I wake up to grapes taped my ears ?
Sorry dude, we didn't want you to hear us. Seemed like a good idea at the time.
also, am i correct in guessing that advertising the size of my hypothetical penis is a turnoff to him?
making my breakfast out of the pot brownies we made last night. Safe to say it's time to go grocery shopping.
We need a hype man... Like a DMX type dude to just up the ante constantly...
I genuinely attribute some of my blowjob skills to playing saxophone in highschool
I just said "I love my cat" as a hobby.
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
For some reason drunk me always leaves sober me a banana in the morning.
Randomize
