I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away
i either bought an eighteen year old girl or i'm engaged to her... i'm not quite sure
dude she wont stop talking about little people big world...she said my penis looked like zach roloff and took a picture with her phone?
i just found a bag of weed behind my capital one card. i guess that's what's in my wallet.
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
I wish Samuel L. Jackson would narrate our bar crawls
We were hunting our best friend with a BB gun in the backyard. I'd say the vaporizer was a worthy investment at this point.
Hi. Tara tells me your sandwiches and stamina are substantial
You spent an hour sitting naked in your neighbor's Jeep Wrangler yelling in a terrible British accent about how you were "on a safari". Then you passed out on your lawn.
I think I achieved my goal of being high for 24 hours in the same week I promised myself I wouldn't smoke anymore
apparently i ended up downloading "thats amore", giving him head, and singing it... all at the same time
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