By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
It's been five and a half years since she and my brother stopped dating. I feel like that's a long enough grace period. Going for it.
you know it's time to start studying when you've procrastinated to the point where you're reading your roommate's ex-boyfriend's wall posts from 2006.
She just did a bodyshot off herself. I don't care that it's only seven thirty, come pick her up.
I WILL NOURISH YOU WITH SOUP AND PENIS!!!!!! And a sandwich of your choosing.......you like turkey?
I just slammed another champagne, swaggered over to her, pointed across the room at the 20 y/o lacrosse player and whispered loudly, "I brought that one for YOU." I'm getting a raise.
I don't have any bail money, if that's where this conversation is going
You burned the hair off your arms. Again.
It grows back stronger each time.
Blow job season was short but glorious.
because. if I can't sit outside naked and eat my watermelon every morning then I really don't see the point in moving in with you.
So after my hot dog popped out of the bun and fell to the ground I tried to pick it back up and eat it. He had to kick it away from me to stop me from trying to pick it back up and eat it. I like him.
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
she prefaced telling me she was pregnant with "houston, we have a problem"
Can I send you a random dick pic? It's got a lightsaber tattoo
Randomize
