woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
She made me cum so hard I couldn't hear for half an hour after
I can't believe I cried over a sausage mcmuffin.
Lights are FLASHING. This just got REAL. CAPTALIZATION.
If is anything like my past relationships, I have no doubt that I will single-handedly reignite the Cold War
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
Doing a circuit workout and using a power hour playlist for my 1 minute timers. I am getting old. creative, but old.
It's not even close to Halloween but there is a girl in a nurses outfit. Twerk or twat.
GUESS WHO STILL HAS BOTH NIPPLES!
I pulled you and a keg around in a wagon for like five hours and apparently everyone else remembers it but us.
The next time we go out, we're bringing a jar so that people can contribute to the rest of what I need to come up with for my breast implants... We'll show them yours for inspiration and persuasion.
Sooooooo Your wife and your girlfriend are making cat noises at one another via text
Nothing ruins an orgasm faster than accidentally calling out his boss's name
just woke up with a trucker hat, half a grilled cheese, and popcorn spread everywhere. last night must have been good.
Randomize
