If it makes you feel any better I'm plucking my mustahce and drinking. Alone.
My dad hugged me and said I love u. I'm glad I didn't pull out that night.
my phone cant type all the emotion im having
we were having sex and she freaked out when i said nipple
New Jersey isn't a real state, it's just a myth you tell little kids to scare them like Canada or Carrot Top
it was really awkward. it took him like like 2 minutes to realize who he was jacking off to. he stopped mid-stroke. such a small small world
i told you not to try chat roulette
you passed out on the bathroom floor with the door locked. we had to break in and no one was sober enough to move you so they just threw a towel on you and stepped over you
Apparently everytime he put me down to bed I escaped out the window, I faintly recall climbing into the canoe in the back yard, and air paddling.
He barely got in the door before she began to shriek like a banshee and punch him. His rainbow wig is still hanging from the front porch as a "warning to all other clowns".
The fact that every guy you've slept with since you've lost virginty either have the same first or last name isn't normal.
I can feel my pain tolerance has shot up right along with my libido
I woke up to realize my keys were on the front porch. Also so was I. So close yet so far
I worry about your feelings an awful lot for somebody who gets off on making you cry
Drug test isn't today. Now I'm just sitting in this orientation with a bag of your piss in my pants
She rode me wearing nothing but a Santa hat. Merriest fucking Christmas!
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