period poops. best. ever.
omigod im sitting here with ben and he and i both got that...chick you totally just mass texted that...
literally every day that goes by where he doesn't talk to me makes me more determined to get him to have sex with me
We spent three hours cleaning our room this morning. It was spotless and smelling good. I come home from work tonight and she has already smoked weed in it and "accidently" spilled vodka on the floor.
He just sent me a dick pic with his iPod held up next to it and the words "in relation to iPod." Geekiest booty call ever.
Champagne is a vitamin, right?
I woke up with a fake mustache stuck to my chest and I can't even hold down water.
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
My heart feels like a grape in a barrel about to be crushed into wine
Her text was so long it had an arrow to expand it. You know it's bad when even your iPhone can't handle her
Ur wingman ability is causing serious doubt
Ok first off its WAY easier if you are actually here
You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
I just spent 3 hours in the back of an unmarked police cruiser. Best. Date. Ever.
I am at 99 matches in less than 24 hours, I need a tinder rehab program
Do you wanna do something, or just stare at each other and fantasize about death like we usually do
Do not ever chug tabasco sauce.
Randomize
