NEED BACKUP we are in the kitchen arguing about who would win in fight against lil Wayne and snoop dog
not only did i manage to get kicked out of the bar, i also got kicked out of denny's. i didnt even know that was possible.
No, don't worry. We're not going to get THAT arrested.
once the "do it" chant starts, any shot at an even remotely dignified party experience is dead.
how do you tell someone you stalk them in a non-creepy way
you don't.
He cut you off when you said Paula Dean was in your soul...He kicked you out when "Paula" started eating random peoples food
i flashed his best friends last night
you always were good at making good first impressions
he puked in my glove box, looked up at me and said "There's not much to say"
the room spins SO much faster in panama
you made sure you came back for your bottle of vodka but didn't remember to take your shoes
We love you just as you are but we might love you more if we didn't have to post bail so often...
Excuse me, but I got friendzoned and all I could think about was the fact that I didn't have my underwear back on yet.
Guess who just made out with Sloth from The Goonies!
I don't know what you slipped me, but my TV is vomming blood right now. Thanks, jerkoff.
GOD I WOULD STAB DANNY IN THE EYE WITH HIS OWN PENIS
.........That big, huh?
No. I would cut it off
Randomize
