Like all of my pajamas are shirts of guys I shacked with in college
when she was cumming she looked like terri schiavo. it took all of my memorized porn images to not go limp.
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
I got kicked out because I puked again I'm on the fire truck outside
Hey everyone. This evenings celebration will commence with a cocktail hour at genghis at 830 to be followed with an upscale dining experience at taco bell at 10. All are welcome. This is not a joke. Thank you
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
my mom found me passed out in the kitchen floor with the Brita pitcher.. Happy Mothers Day
I found a phone book at the party and started calling everyone with my last name asking if they wanted to form a club. I'm meeting one for brunch tomorrow...
Somehow I've got the party rigged to where I get a foot massage every time someone wants a beer out of the fridge. Hellz yeah
how do you play pong handcuffed?
Know what's awkward? Having a couple of moving guys watch while you detach the bondage cuffs from your bedframe, that's what.
When we missed a fist bump and simultaneously did the Rocket Power handshake I knew I was going to blow him.
Ok you had this coming you put a sponsored filter on a dick pic
I HAVE A TEST I'M SORRY YOUR UN SUCKED DICK ISN'T MY FIRST CONCERN
when some dude came up to you and said he didn't like your shirt you just looked at him and firmly asked if he really thought that you gave a fuck.
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