So i'm in mason getting an ultrasound.. and there are a bunch of hicks in here with their wild ass children and this one young mom yells at her kid "harley sit!"
You should introduce yourself as garth. As in garth brooks.
I saw his package. It spoke to me.
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
I got into my dads silver toyota in the back seat to get picked up and 2 mins later I asked my dad when are we leaving, then an old mexican woman turned around. wrong toyota I'm guessing.
He gave me a pearl necklace on top of my Karma necklace I was wearing. I guess I deserve whats coming to me.
...and the foreplay consisted of me threatening to cut off his hand if he didn't remove it from my back.
Is that you who's passed out on my treadmill?
It took years to rebuild my brains forcefield against your charm and I feel like u seal team 6'd ur way in again and caught my common sense sleeping on post
I woke up in confetti... confetti and shame
Things you Cant unsee: When your smartphone syncs to your dads laptop and downloads photos...including his porn stash.
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
You've changed since you got that strap on
So, looks like I managed to leave my bra in the boardroom after all the sex. FML.
that's the second time my extensive knowledge of taylor swift has gotten me laid
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