At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
my sisters under your porch take her home
is it sad that i can describe this night as "the night that i was sober" and we all know which night it was. like literally one night of sobriety.
So help me Jesus we're never drinking together again. But weekends don't count. Amen.
Passing out is just my bodies way of protecting my liver.
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
Currently doing my walk of shame down a floating dock. No more guys who live on a boat EVER AGAIN
Is it a good time to tell him he's getting too clingy if he sent me a picture of my name spelled with Cheerios?
i have officially banned the recreational use of bayonets.
I know, I know. But we've discussed my friends and appropriate social behaviour, and I'm pretty sure topless karaoke was a no-no.
I drank, I fought, I made my ancestors proud.
And then someone hit me with a pool cue
If waking up at 6 50 pm every day and getting invited to go have sex as you wake up is what alcoholism is like I can get use to this.
He used the term 'cock-staggering' in an email. So needless to say things are going pretty well.
Guy in my class today said, "I'm pretty sure you think about beer 95% of the time."
Uber driver has left leg up on the dash and turn signal on for about a mile, there's Chipotle wrappers on the floor, but she's hot. 5 stars.
Randomize
