i feel like after you turn 30 you aren't supposed to black out anymore
i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
Well, I fucked her. But the sex wasn't all that great. Morning sex never is
My mom is wearing Ed Hardy. There aren't words.
He was spoon feeding me wine all night.
I think a 5 ft pyramid of jello shots in honor of the egyptians is in order
As shirtless as possible
He woke me up for a 10am bootycall. he was already drunk when he got here and when we were fucking, bagpipes started playing amazing grace outside of my window!! I love Boston on st. Patties day!!
We're having soft pretzels and cheese dip for dinner tonight. Like fucking adults.
Based on your 5AM twitter activity I gather you found MORE FREE COKE??
I achieved maximum drunk last night. It was pretty extreme. Woke up on a couch, outside, in a suit
Like I thought me shitting my pants was bad today... Then the election happened.
he was the first penis i touched… i have to go to his shitty bands first gig, i mean come on now
Could’ve gone my whole life not seeing a man snort coke off another man’s cock... but there it is...
I’m done with him. I’m going to the beach to catch a fresh dick
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