I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
you rearended a car with your bike and then puked all over his back windshield. They made BUI's for you.
My fave moment of today was you sitting in a hot pink innertube puking into the ocean in front of a lot of children. i would have held your hair back but the ocean did it for you.
im so poor im using the bottom of my laptop to heat my food.
I'd really appreciate it if we could dress up as pilgrims and indians for the thanksgiving eve bar crawl
Unlimited sex for unlimited netflix. I can deal with that. I think this is the first prostitution deal for netflix ever.
Did I send you an asleep facebook message about the upcoming football season titled 'BRILLIANT' at 4:45 this morning?
I'm at a bar where I literally walked in to the bathroom and some chick told me to never go to San Joaquin state pen
Every minute you wait for the sex that's not gonna happen, we're missing a tone deaf, drunk, tard-asaurus rex half-sing a 90's song to a bunch of other dinotards at karaoke.
I'm still me, I just happen to have things in my porn library that you may not have expected
Only you would come out as bi like that
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
he offered me cocaine within 5 minutes of my arrival. yes of course i'm keeping him
Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms
If you ever "miss" working, I'm going to fist you with my hulk hands. BOTH of them.
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
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