I heard you threw up in your lap?
I heard that too.
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
i just woke up to 15 people singing a whole new world
He said I taste like butterscotch, licked me, then I'm pretty sure he wet his pants. So no, I do not want to invite him over.
Oh my god it just tripped me out that I used to be a baby, I had to tell you.
Why is the garage door in the middle of the street?
Do your friends by chance have our inflatable deer head?
Nevermind, it's in the dryer.
He needs to stop telling me how much he respects me. What does that even mean
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
STOP LICKING HIS MUSTACHE
bro, your right, i shouldn't feel embarrassed about taking shots from a penis-shaped ice sculpture
2013: the year of legs covered in hair and pregnancy scares.
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
The tequila monkeys have a drum solo in my skull right now. I can't imagine Emily feels better.
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