that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
You tried to luge a beer down a flip flop.
I'm so pissed my boobs hit the emergency stop button during my workout
Why yes actually, getting stoned and reading an AARP magazine IS totally where I wanted my night to end!
I need to beat up a magician now. BRB.
If I have to give a UPS guy a lap dance, you owe me a drink.
You're putting the star player on the bench. You dont put Michael Jordan on the bench.
Are you referring to my vagina as Michael Jordan?
My saliva right now is around 7.6% alcohol/volume.
I'm high and I have a consensual booty call on the way and just thought that it was a good time to let you know that I think that you are a stellar person.
I woke up naked on my couch playing a video game I thought I had dreamed about... oh yeah, and someone cut my hair.
I want to just live in between your butt cheeks.
Well I woke up and my arm was bleeding. And my blood is on the wall in the hallway.
Umm
No idea. I blame fireball.
Valid.
Please hurry. I'm the only one here who's not an attorney with a trophy wife.
TSA found the edibles
Fuck
Oh my god he just. Swiped them for explosives and handed them back to me
God bless California
Randomize
