Worst sexual experience IN MY LIFE. And now i know why it makes jesus cry.
How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
I don't know how I got that girl last night. I feel like seal right now sans the scars
I just heard a woman call her child a butt face. Repeatedly. He's crying now. I love walmart.
The cab driver just finished telling me how leaving community college after one month was the best desicion he ever made.
You're so easy to please, it's adorable. Like an alcoholic puppy.
the plan is to continue having sex with all three of them until my birthday, and then once they've given me their presents, they can find out about each other.
I haven't been this hungover since you found me laying in front of your door gagging with pepto bismal tablets scattered around me
A girl just told me she printed out my pictures and taped them on her wall. I have to stop sleeping with virgins.
THE BIG GAY MAD HATTER IS HERE AND HE HAS DRUGS IN HIS PANTS FOR YOU. COME DOWNSTAIRS BITCHEZZZZ
will you please stage a drunk girl intervention and tell him that his chain is severely harming his chances of getting laid tonight?
Drink for every country you've never heard of.
Fuuuuuuuuuck
You came over, called every girl Comrade Heather, and then declared that you were an Eagle, and we were your young.
So all in all, a good night.
fell down stairs ended up in underground bar now im dancing with trannies and best night of my life. lines of coke
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
Randomize
