That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
I gave the naked guy in the hotel hall a pop tart. He stopped crying.
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
Oh so it was one of those "I shouldn't have gotten in a cab with a random 21 year old girl" kinda nights.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am currently listening to someone take a shit. I hate the hole in the ceiling.
It was just a friend comforting a friend. Except his penis was inside of me.
People dont know what to do when a naked fat guy is running towards them. they panic
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
I faked more orgasms with him then ever should be allowed for someone this pretty.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Walked in on my roommate covering his dick in blue frosting. Am staying with my folks for the Forth. See you Monday if the brain bleach works.
I taught a straight girl about grindr today. She showed me tinder. It was like some sexual cultural exchange program
I was about to google "rabies and sexual activity." Then I realized I was at work.
If last night was a preview of 2015, I quit.
Haha just talked to the dude you bit on Thursday. He has been growing a beard to hide the bruising....
You know you have an interesting job when you go to work and have to Google search "How to get poop out of a dryer".
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