Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
I finally got her to squirt but it wasnt a stream, it came out in the form of mist. I felt like I was in rainforest cafe.
How would I get in touch with Carly Rae Jepsen if I wanted to thank her for the loss of my virginity?
Myy bathroom floor makes me think I'm on Mars. Also. Did you realize that yesterday we perfected thee mind high-five??
Leaving my wallet at work and not going out to drink tonight...SIGN FROM THE UNIVERSE.
This is me trying to take a picture to send to grandma. At 4. We were trying to look sober.
We are making a pool on how long he stays sober this time you want in?
Are you trying to say I've made an emotionally well rounded transformation similar to the Grinch?
He fucked me over, so I'm going to do what any rational woman does. I'm going to get really high and have sex with his brother.
Will Smith has a direct hotline to my emotions
If you don't respond in the next 30min, I'm going to assume your in a sex coma, in jail, or dead... All of which I've become accustomed to, and will follow the appropriate channels of notification once you notify me.
There is a huge naked guy in the kitchen with the boner of a lifetime and what I believe is an assault rifle casually resting on his shoulder.
Now, I know I say this a lot, but you've obviously never seen my penis.
he was just sitting there in his underwear... and his chewbacca mask...
Randomize
