Omg. Get me out of here. Someone is playing michelle branch.
how am i supposed to spank it to a shakira video when she looks like she is doing the robot?
The paper boy just woke me up in the front yard again.
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
How many times can you lose to your mom in beer pong before you can no longer show your face around campus?
Currently microwaving whipped cream to make white Russians and hotboxing the kitchen while this random kid is dancing in the corner.
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
I'm sitting next to a ginger. She is decked out in olive green. Gingers fucking love olive green.
You know what i just remembered? I asked the 8 ball if i was gonna get kicked out this semester before any of this stuff happened and it said yes. ITS REAL.
I AM THERE IN SPIRIT, TICKLING YOUR BALLS
I actually bought food at McDonald's as an apology for what I was about to do to their bathroom.
I woke up with a stapler in my ass. Don't even complain to me.
I refuse to shit my pants for anyone except Cher and Christina Aguilera!
she's 6'2. you bet your ass i slept with her.
Randomize
