Blowing lines off from the book where the wild things are... bad babysitter?
2am update: i think I'm in Mexico but I found a dennys. Everyone but this cute family of 4 is speaking Spanish. Cute family of 4 is helping me out.
If this herpes test comes back negative I'm asking out the doctor.
Apparently I spent my 300 dollar tax return by ordering ramen on amazon last night. Please tell me this will somehow pay off in the long run.
we didnt even have break up sex...
you had it for us with someone else...
So I'm seriously not complaining - but I just fell ass backwards into a Tuesday night threesome. Sober
what kind of one night stand wants to walk you home in the morning? whole diff kind of walk of shame.
It's like a teen mom casting at the Obgyn's office. I feel great about my positive life decisions.
Come get me we have a petting zoo to throw up in.
And I'm bringing my coffee cup of wine.
You screamed "i promise ill stop blowing your brother" in the middle of a packed restaurant at 1pm. We should maybe rethink our relationship.
Sorry I crashed a riding mower into your garage door. No hard feelings??
my life is like one bad, slutty lifetime movie.
She handed me scissors and told me that they were the ones with the lowest probability of having been used to trim someone's pubes.
YOU UNCULTURED BADGER
Randomize
