ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
I hate thxgiving break now because that totally means I'm not able to have sex for a week.
I wish the health center treadmills counted beers burned not calories
she said she didn't want to sleep with me again because I wasnt a generous lover. I ignored her slight moustache, didnt i? i think thats pretty damn generous
1 in 5 deaths i nrussia is alcohol related. GO MOTHERLAND
I hope you realize, I'm counting on you as my wingman next semester. It's your turn to advertise another man's penis. I did my tour all freshman year.
Im otw to class. I was at the Library. Just past three girls with a bottle of tequila playing dizzy bat.
In my defense, I haven't stolen anyone's clothes yet.
Yeah, that's a plus.
You were just so carefree! People were like, "there's broken glass everywhere" and you were just like, IDGAFFFFFFF
He said he cried as he watched porn yesterday; I'd say he's taking the break-up pretty bad....
I gave him blue balls & ate the last slice of pie so the chances of a second date are slim...
His wife just cheated on him for the third time. I'm his first extra-marital fling, that makes it ok, right? You know to keep karma balanced in the universe
Your logic is flawless...
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
Just made a drug contact standing in the sandwich line in the dining hall. Is this real life?
You're my fucking hero.
I've been on the cocaine and semen diet for the last 24 hours, lunch sounds great.
Randomize
