Picking up third year law school girls is like MILF hunting for beginners
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
Using the ceiling fan to slice the hotdogs in mid-air can only be contributed to our liberal use of 1800.
the kid throwing up and laying face down on the deck just asked ME if I'M okay...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if you do the accent, i'll wear the eyepatch
He better not be in your backpack
Not genetic. He's drunk and texted me a dick pic. Not genetic. Thank God!
It started out as friends with benefits and now I'm picking up her kids from daycare...what has happened to me
I'm going as your incestuous sister. If thats not the perfect winglady I don't know what is.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm 10 cats away from completing my post divorce transformation.
You may have gone on a date, but I ate chicken nuggets shaped like dinosaurs for dinner tonight. I think we both know who the real winner is here.
That's a beautiful sentiment.
you don't understand it took me an hour and a half to escape that bed, I had to memorize his sleeping patterns.
I love how encouraging you are, but I need you to stop me when the guy I'm going home with is a dead ringer for Nick Cage.
sometimes i forget what nice tits i have and then i spend a month brushing my teeth naked in the front of the bathroom mirror, and i remember.
I honestly have no desire to wear clothes around you
I have that affect on people
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