I think east. Tornado watch. What the fuck are you doing in Texarkana?
Bonnaroo. Tornado watch? Expand on that thought.
Watch for tornadoes.
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
I'll probably regret it tomorrow. But right now, accepting this $2000 credit card so that I can finance booty calls from across the united states sounds like a golden idea.
I brought him flowers on my way home from cheating on him. Boyfriend of the year award right here.
first thing my tuition money buys is a strap on
Dude we both faced 40s of steel reserve which is like saying, "Hey, I'm a complete piece of shit!"
Am I a bad person for getting my ex to DD me and a random hookup home last night?
I'm still laying in bed cuz I don't feel like adulting yet
not sure when or how we ended up at this wedding party but you need to be here they are handing out screwdrivers and Yamakas to everyone and it's a got damn open bar you need to be here now
I swear to god if you settle for a trump supporting packers fan, I will not acknowledge your children. You're better than that.
I don't trust my subconscious. It sleeps with my exboyfriend sometimes.
I wish I could be the kind of drunk Bobbi is... She stumbles around outside at 4am with a broken high heel and babbling about rainbows and getting dick...
It just makes sense. It's like I end a relationship, and wash myself of sin... with tequila.
Had a one night stand and didnt remember the guys name until he started sending me poems in the mail.
Dude I just woke up naked on the floor with my dick in a boot. Legit in a fucking boot. I also have no idea where I am.
Randomize
