I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
His facebook status is an owl city song. I'm so glad i didn't end up fucking him.
Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
You kept referring to your penis as "this guy."
she asked me which thongs i though her boyfriend would like best. fuck the friend zone
Just sponge bathed with a swissper. Thrush inevitable. Shaking.
I projectile vomited in his sisters room where the toiled would have been if it were the bathroom.
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
About to go get a free burrito for kissing a bald man in public
Having boobs is probably the greatest thing in the world, free booze all around
Do not tell me I cant do drunk math ever again, AND I made a creative way of telling him I want him to fuck me.
When I told her I was deaf and took my hearing aids out at night to sleep, she said it must be nice not having to hear drunken roommates having awkward sex late at night.
Hey how're your balls?
Don't ever let me helicopter again.
I feel so accomplished. I've cleaned my room, done laundry, called those places, gotten jobs, and masturbated.
I'm so proud of you.
i just realized i have only had sex on couches so far this year. i can't decide if that's impressive or trashy
Randomize
