I would have at least made out with you if you were showered.
i had a dream the other night i was titty fucking you while you were asleep, then you woke up and didn't care.
listening to techno makes your hand move faster while masterbating
why isn't there a fb relationship option that says 'still banging my ex'
Tis a story best told in person, it involves a golf course, police and vomit
It usually does with you
She ended up puking in the bathroom. But she's a good drunk... i told her to stay in there so i could dance til the club closed. She was still in the stall an hour later.
Trust me. I don't get home before 5am. I know what Immmm doing. BTW bail money is in my closet. PEACE
My boss just sent an employee on an hour long paid break to pick up weed for our 'staff meeting' tomorrow morning.
so far, I've observed him try to hit on 3 girls, 1 guy and a bar stool. Humanity is amazing from a sober point of view.
So what's today's forecast for the female rollercoaster you've been riding?
Nahh no judgin. Compliments to the balls are always heartfelt
We inadvertently arrived at the strip club on Bear Night. The dancers all look like young Santa Claus and there's a buffet....
How old am I that I had to sneak a boy out of my room this morning...
wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck
yes
There way too many people in that club who have had their dick in me
Randomize
