I accidentally had sex with my boyfriend's twin last night...and he didn't stop me.
How was it?
Fantastic, but that's not the point.
He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
i upgraded from drunk texts to drunk e-mails...real world here i come
last day of my family cruise we all got trashed and had an award ceremony. I got the award for hooking up with a cougar. my grandma hugged me and said im living up to the legacy. this is why my familys better than yours
Drinking wine in my childhood bed getting ready to go to sleep in order to wake up for my menial temp job. Thanks, college degree, I can handle the real world.
Don't talk about his dick. That's mine. There's a copyright on it. Use with permission
Whatever. I'll just fuck him now and deal with the clingyness later.
Steve called. He needs me to pick him up. He also asked for a set of his clothes, he can't find them. He is such a strong motivation to stay sober.
Just watched a guy ride a bike off his roof into his pool. On my way to the liquor store, picking you up in 20
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
Omg that was my second thought of the morning.
First was that we had pop tarts.
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
I give out orgasms like candy and ride a motorcycle...how is that not appealing
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