U know its gonna be a great day when the guy at the liquor store waves at u cause u walked by
If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
Apparently Chef Boyardee is the only guy I'm taking home tonight.
anyone who buys me chipotle gets an automatic hj
we were naked in his bed and he told me all about what a "baller" alexander the great was.
I wish alcohol would automatically work as birth control if you have sex drunk.
they're mlb prospects.. of course i'm gonna bang one of them.
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
I didn't know where we were going to start fucking, so I just strategically hid condoms all over the house before he came over.
This morning on my way to work I saw a guy ride his bike straight into a woman and her dog while trying to light a bowl. Thought of you.
White girls? They're everywhere. In packs. Drunk white girl packs.
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
Your level of morning after guilt is too much right now. Do less.
I tried to text you about going to the Lion's Den but sent it to my boss. She was down for it. Please advise.
Apparently walking into a national conference and proclaiming "i'm here to fuck shit up" is frowned upon.
Who knew?
Randomize
